{Truth Thursday} Feeling small?

Assisting and partnering with my husband in the Youth Ministry of our church has allowed me to meet many amazing and inspiring and I dare say, great, Christians. I am always blessed with their testimonies on how God is working in their lives and how faithful they have been, despite the difficulties. 

At the same time, observing my husband tackle his role as a youth worker in church has allowed me to see the many big tasks and challenges the Lord has placed and  allowed to be conquered by His grace. 

Very recently, we had a Youth Retreat for all young people in church (and some of their invited friends) and I was just amazed at how the Lord equipped my husband to make everything possible. Being a government employee from 8am-5pm, the only thing that I could actually do was to prepare my lecture on Submission to Authorities and relevant laws for the youth of today and to show up at the venue. Even the packing of our things has to be done by my dear husband. 

Because of this, I sometimes would feel too small of myself when it comes to the ministry. Because I have a deceitful and sinful heart very much prone to the enticements of the enemy, there were times that I would feel discouraged and I would even question my worth as a worker in God's Kingdom. 

I feel too small. Unimportant. Very much disposable. Insignificant. 

There are times that I would secretly wish I had the humor and wit of another so it would be easier for me to share the Gospel. At times, too, I'd feel bad about myself not being capable of doing great things for the Lord, not being able to lead a large group Bible study, not being able to treat young people to more expensive cafes and restos, not being able to be fashionably updated so I can relate more with them, etc. In short, I hated myself, the one God created me to be.  

Of course, as I have stated in the earlier paragraph, this problem stems in my heart. 

And I am so thankful that the Lord always knows the depths of my heart and His Truth (the Bible) is always there to heal my insecurities. 

I am currently re-reading the Book of Acts in my morning devotional and sometime last month, I was in Chapter 6 where the story of Stephen starts. I have always been fascinated by the life of Stephen and how the Bible describes him: a man full of faith and the Holy Spirit. Later, he is then described to have the face that looked like an angel. 

But who is Stephen by the way?

In Chapter 6, his name is mentioned as one of the seven men chosen by the 12 disciples for the daily distribution of foods among the believers. Because this concern on daily food distribution was entrusted to them, the disciples were able to devote themselves to prayer and ministry of the word and the word of God spread that even the high priests believed in Jesus Christ.

In the next verses, we learned that Stephen did amazing wonders and miracles because he was full of God's grace and power. This made some men oppose him and when they could not outdo Stephen's wisdom from the Spirit, they planned to have Stephen eliminated. Chapter 7 and Chapter 8 narrate Stephen's speech before the Sanhedrin and his death by stoning. 

What the New Living Translation (NLT) Life Application Bible mentions about Stephen is quite enlightening. What was highlighted in the Commentary/Notes is the fact that I have (and I believe most of us have) neglected many times--Stephen started serving the Lord in the daily distribution of food for all of the believers!

Yes, he, along with the other six men, distributed food among the believers on a day to day basis. Sounds boring, right? Insignificant? Small? A task too negligible to be appreciated? Without batting an eyelash, I would probably say yes to all. 

But Stephen was not chosen to do this seemingly "small" task because he was less important. In fact, he was chosen because he met the criteria: full of the Spirit and wisdom. 

Another thing that struck me here is the fact that Stephen did not complain when he was given that "small" task of distributing food. For my very limited human view, I would have considered such task too menial and too un-spiritual. But hey, if we look closely to the verses, the Gospel spread rapidly because the 12 disciples were able to devote to the word and the ministry of the word and this was because Stephen and the six men were faithful to their seemingly "small" and menial task of food distribution. 

Later on, we see Stephen's life being used greatly by God. He was the first to die for Jesus Christ and because of his death, the believers were scattered; thus, the Gospel spread throughout Judea and Samaria and around the world. His death profoundly impacted Saul, a staunch persecutor of the Christians, who was later on converted to the faith and became the amazing Paul. 

Such is the dynamics of the early church. God has placed every single soul for a purpose. There was no superstar complex nor did the believers compete with each other neither did they compare themselves with one another. There was no small or big task.

They simply did their job with so much love and faithfulness for Jesus Christ. 

Because the truth is, the Lord does not look at how big our task is or how great our performance of our ministry is. More than anything else, He cares at our faithfulness, even on things that might come as "small" to our limited human standards. 

So, whether we only wash dishes in church, or we are assigned with the distribution of giveaways, or we are merely the LCD projector operator during Sundays, (or even if we are not yet involved in the ministry but we merely pray and study the Word)--let's do it with so much love and faithfulness to our King! 

No task is ever too small to Him. And He knows when and how to promote those who are faithful.

I pray that today, if you are reading this, you will be blessed by the Word of God through the life of Stephen and that the next time you feel small, you will think of this truth: God does not care at the size of our ministry; He cares at our faithfulness. 

Happy {Truth Thursday}!

{Marriage Monday} Marriage's Top Secret

This is my second {Marriage Monday} post. To know more about this series, please read my first post here.

One of our pre-nup photos, taken by the amazing talents of Super Seven Studio. 

Today, I am quite excited to share the top secret for fulfilling and thriving marriages! :)

But let me digress for a while and tell you about myself and my awesome hubby. We have been married for, hold your breath...seven...months, that is. And  I am telling this fact to make a point here. Since, I published my first post  a week ago, I felt inadequate for doing so. Why, everybody would probably question my credibility on writing a marriage series when I have been married for only seven months!

But that is just basically what I wanted to do here. Marriage is crazy-beautiful but it takes a lot of hard work for it to become well, crazy-beautiful. For the seven months that I have been married to the love of my life, I can say that the quality of our marriage totally depends on our attitude and hard work. If we want a thriving and loving relationship, then, we have to work at it. It is the same as our desire to have healthy bodies--we have to work for it, make sacrifices, eat healthy choices, and say no to a lot of junk food that has, unfortunately, become mainstream staples in our tables today. 

So, this series every Monday is part of my "working hard" efforts for a thriving and loving marriage. I am not saying that I have perfectly applied everything I have written here nor have my husband and I attained the perfect state for our relationship. No, we're quite far from that! 

These posts are here to remind me what I am working hard for and why I am doing it. I will not only post tips and lessons that I learned but my struggles and failures as well, with the permission of my beloved husband, of course! ;)

I also hope that the Lord will use this {Marriage Monday} series to encourage and minister to other women, whether they be single, recently married, enjoying marriage or struggling with marriage. This is the place where we can encourage each other, laugh at each other's mistakes, cry with our struggles, and pray with and for each other. :) 

Basically, this {Marriage Monday} series has a two-pronged purpose: one for myself and my hubby, and two, for everybody! 

Last week, I wrote about the real and ultimate purpose of getting married and that is, to reflect Christ. I honestly believe that it is only when we know our exact purpose that we can actually function well, thrive, and be fulfilled. Knowing our real purpose is the basic foundation. If we know our correct purpose, then, we know our right destination and the proper way of getting there. 

Today, let me share to you the TOP SECRET of a loving and thriving marriage, which is also very much related to the real purpose of matrimony. I am no marriage expert but by the way I see it, this is the most important secret and the good thing is, it is not actually a secret. Everybody knows about it; it is very basic. Yet, it is too basic for us to neglect it at times. 

So, the top secret for marriage to be successful is actually one word: FORGIVENESS. 

Yes, that is right. CAPSLOCK that, highlight, and underline because it needs all the emphasis to make a mark in our minds and hearts. 

You see, if our real purpose in marriage (and in life, actually) is to reflect Christ, then we must know and live forgiveness. 

For Christ came to this world while we're still sinners and demonstrated His great love for us by dying a shameful and painful death on the Cross so that our sins will be forgiven. God initiated forgiveness. And He keeps on forgiving us every time our heart truly repents.

Since the purpose of every marriage is to mirror Christ in this dark and horrible world, then our marriages should show His forgiveness--unconditional, faithful, true, complete, abounding, inexhaustible. 

And I don't want to be a hypocrite in writing this. Before I had a personal relationship with Christ, I used to claim that forgiveness is not in my vocabulary. Once one of my friends or acquaintances offend me, then, that person is automatically flushed out of my heart and mind. That's how callous I was, dear friends, and I do hope that you will not judge me by my past. ;)

So, just imagine how hard it is for me to transition as I live and build relationships with Christ as the basis! And how harder it is now for me to live under one roof, one room, and share one bed with my husband who has quite a different background/stand/opinion/habit from me? 

Too many times I have fallen for the trap of conditional forgiveness. "I will forgive you if...." "I will forgive you but..." "I will forgive you when..." The list can go on and on. 

But I always remember how the Father has forgiven me. He never negotiated with me like this. He never said "I will send Jesus Christ to die for you if you change your ways" or "I will forgive you if you promise never to sin again." No, He sent His only begotten Son to die for me even though He knows that I will offend him countless of times. He sent Jesus anyway. 

Too many times too I have fallen for the trap of pride. More often than not, I know I have offended my hubby dear but I was too arrogant to ask for forgiveness. "I'm his wife so I am entitled to royal treatment"--this is what would often cross my mind. 

There are also times that it would be my hubby's fault so I'd tell myself that he should say sorry first. 

But by the Spirit's nudging, I'd realize that humility is essential. If Christ, Himself God in His own right, was humble enough to leave his Heavenly Throne to be among us so that He could die for us, then, what right/entitlement do I have not to ask for forgiveness? 

Often, I would be too hard-headed to feel or obey the Holy Spirit's nudging. And often, I would usually realize late and feel so embarrassed of myself before I can actually confess my sins and ask for forgiveness. 

Next week, I am going to share to you several lessons/advice I got when it comes to forgiveness. 

For now, I am going to end this post with two practical steps in forgiving and asking for forgiveness:

1) Think of JESUS on the Cross; and

2) Swallow your pride. 

Happy Monday! I pray that we will continue to show forgiveness to everybody and be quick to ask for forgiveness should we offend someone... Enjoy the rest of the week!


*All photos are from our pre-nup session with Super Seven Studios. 

{Marriage Monday} Reflecting Christ

This is one of my favorite shots of my made-to-order gown. Before getting married, I wanted to have those expensive designer gowns but by God's grace and the few women whom He used to speak to me, I realized that my wedding need not be grand and expensive. The most important thing, I realized, is our MARRIAGE. And my prayer since then is that God's glory and story will be the canopy of our life together as husband and wife.

Seven months ago, I took the plunge to give up my self to be united with the man I love--the man I have always considered as God's sweet surprise and wonderful blessing, the man the Lord has lovingly chosen for me, the man who has continuously shown me short glimpses of His glory. 

A year ago, I released all fears and placed them at the feet of the Lord as my sweet surprise and wonderful blessing formally asked my hand in marriage from my parents {and a fleet of my relatives! :)}, fulfilling all customs and traditions, which event ultimately showed God's glory and favor. 

And so, today, as we celebrate these beautiful manifestations of God's love and favor, I am taking the plunge, saying goodbye to my comfort zone, and reluctantly but excitedly obeying God's nudge--I am starting this {Marriage Monday} series to show my thoughts on this crazy-beautiful thing we call marriage and to share lessons I learned from the Bible and from the Godly women I look up to. 

One of the things I loved about our wedding is that we got to incorporate a lot of handmade elements! ;) Shown here is our handmade ring and arrhae pillow-nests. We decided to veer away with the traditional ring and arrhae pillows and instead, chose a nest to go with our theme. Because we are a bit needy when it comes to arts and crafts, the Lord blessed us with the awesome Veronica Vallente-Vicuna of The Purple Parasol to create these lovely nests!

To start this {Marriage Monday} series, let me share to you what I have learned about the ultimate purpose of matrimony. 

When I was younger, I have always thought that you get married to start a family and by starting a family, I can somehow contribute something to the world and perhaps make the future brighter by raising smart, good, law-abiding kids.

Life happened and I realized that I only love kids when they are not mine and so my mind trail took a different turn and my naivety dictated that I should get married for companionship. 

As I grew older, I became more selfish and I concluded that marriage was invented to satisfy the different physical, emotional, and financial needs of the husband and the wife. 

Somewhere along this journey, I bumped into the beautiful and awesome Lord and Savior who loved me first, gave His life to purchase me from the bondage of sins, and gave me a new life through His resurrection. I read and learned and experienced first hand how important it is to be satisfied in Him first and foremost before ever longing to have a husband and a lifetime partner. I learned more things about love and relationships in His way, which were usually way too different from the ways of the world. 

Our wedding was held four days after a 7.2 magnitured earthquake hit our province. Bridges were cut in half, buildings were destroyed, even old churches collapsed in rubbles. But the Lord is still so faithful in His promise, He even made a way that we can still have beautiful flowers on our special day :)

And then He gave these beautiful verses in Ephesians and through a Saturday Bible class and a Friday Homebuilders Fellowship, He made it clear: He created marriage to mirror Jesus Christ. 

Marriage is not about satisfying each other (although that is an integral part of the husband-wife relationship) nor is it about having beautiful children (though it will make it more fun but we should always remember that it is God who gives and takes away). 

Marriage is reflecting Christ in ourselves and seeing glimpses of Him from our spouses.  

As a couple united in the Lord, it is our duty to safeguard this high purpose. It is our duty to actively pursue this purpose so that we may show to the whole world Christ and His love, faithfulness, goodness, kindness, mercy, forgiveness. 

While preparing for our wedding, there were things that I really wanted which would not fit into our budget. While I could have used my debating skills or dramatic prowess to convince my then hubby-to-be to increase the budget, God used several persons to tell me and constantly remind me that the ultimate goal of getting married is not to have a grand wedding ceremony and reception but to reflect Christ in ourselves and to the world. 

This gave me so much peace in the preparation and anticipation that I freely threw away my dream of preparing for a grand wedding. This allowed me to focus on the essentials--instead of being busy of preparing for a wedding, God gave us so much time to prepare our hearts and lives for our marriage.

How do we live out God's purpose for marriage? The best answer that I learned is to simply live by His Word, the Bible. 

Now that we are seven months into our marriage, I can honestly tell you in the eye that it is really hard to reflect Christ all the time. 

As the verses proclaim, my role as a wife is to joyfully submit to my husband just as the church submits to Christ. And I tell you this, for a strong-willed woman like me who basically lives my growing up years in the women power era, it is really HARD to submit. There are times that my selfishness creeps in and all I wanted to do is to allow my sinful self to reign.  

But as I ponder on God's word more and more, the more I realized that it is the only way to have a satisfying and lasting marriage. God created marriage to mirror Christ and it is through reflecting Christ-likeness to our spouse and the people around us that we can find true joy and fulfillment in our marriages. 

It may be hard but the One who called us to do this will enable us. From our text in Ephesians 5, God's words tell us that we should follow Christ in living out our lives. And if we go backwards to Ephesians 4, we have the assurance that God is for all, over all, through all and in all. If He is for us, over us and works through us and in us, there is no reason that we cannot reflect His glory in our marriages. 

My prayer today is that all of us who are married and all those who are planning to get married will discover God's ultimate purpose for this beautiful thing we call "marriage" and may we call on the one true God to equip us and enable us to fulfill this purpose that more and more people will see Christ in ourselves, in our marriages, and in our families. 

Extravagant Love

I have a huge confession to make. And I am going to write it because I want to be reminded of this every time I slip.

You see, I have been a slack in my devotional time (my husband and I call it QT for quality time with the Lord) the past two or three weeks. Before, I used to wake up really early but now my body clock refuses to go alert unless and until it is six o'clock in the morning. And when I do not start my day with a quality time with the Lord, I usually mess up--when I have problems, I resort to talking with my sister or friends or my husband before even praying or talking to God and this would normally lead to more chaos. I can pinpoint many other illustrations but I would limit to just this one to save on time and space. But the end point is this: If I don't spend time with the Lord in a day, I usually make stupid and unGodly decisions.

But you might ask, "Hey, this post is about extravagant love. What's your point in sharing you slacking in your quality time with the Lord?"

Photo Source: darrellcreswell.wordpress.com 

 Well, my friends...That exactly is my point here--the extravagant love of God. That no matter how many times I have fallen in this area, He still continue to shower me with unending grace and unconditional love.

But of course, this is not my license to slack or to sin.

My point here is this: I am extremely dumbfounded to wake up every morning and still feel myself breathing, still see and eat tasty meals, and still get to be able to dress nicely (ahem! I am claiming it! haha) and still think properly in the office and in my cases, despite my inadequacies and weaknesses! It is just so amazing to know how great, how deep, how expansive, and how perfect is God's love for me and I am just so thankful that I am not in control of my life.

Photo Source: darrellcreswell.wordpress.com 

And I am so thankful that God is perfect and that He is not like me 'coz I would have given up on myself a long time ago. Really. If I were God (which, thankfully I am not and will never be and let me just put it on record that I neither have any desire), I would have punished myself severely for the sloth and all kinds of sin I do everyday. Every time I would sin or fall short, I would have my "payback time," so to speak.

That is, if I am God. Fortunately, I am not. And I am so much fortunate that my God is a perfect, holy, and faithful God. :))

Which brings to mind the need to deny the false belief some people hold on today that God operates the way we, humans, do--that for every sin we do against him, He will retaliate and cause us so much misfortune. While it is true that bad things happen when we sin, it is also equally important to stress that these supposedly bad things are just consequences of our bad decisions, actions, reactions, etc. In short, bad things happen as natural consequences of our sins.

But no matter how bad our situation may look to us, God's love for us never changes. The consequences of our sins may look bad to us but if we put our trust to the Lord Jesus, then He will make things turn out for our own good. Once we have accepted Jesus Christ as our personal Lord and Savior, His love will never let us go until the end, even if we sin or are in trouble. For it is written in the book of Romans, Chapter 8 therein:

 ³⁵ Can anything ever separate us from Christ’s love? Does it mean he no longer loves us if we have trouble or calamity, or are persecuted, or hungry, or destitute, or in danger, or threatened with death? ³⁶ (As the Scriptures say, “For your sake we are killed every day; we are being slaughtered like sheep.”^[a]) ³⁷ No, despite all these things, overwhelming victory is ours through Christ, who loved us.³⁸ And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,^[b] neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. ³⁹ No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Once we have Christ as Savior and Lord in our hearts, our salvation is complete. No one can no longer take that away from us. :)

This is the truth from the words of God, Himself.

And let me end with this picture that says it all:

navaljournalofchristianfellowship.wordpress.com

Happy Truth Thursday, everyone! :)))

The Amazing Love

The whole world celebrates the Day of Love today. If you have read my Valentine's post last year, you might already know that my then-fiance-now-hubby, C,  and I never celebrated this particular holiday in our relationship. I enumerated my reasons and argued my points in there. But I did emphasize that I was not against anyone who chose to celebrate this holiday. To each his own, they say.

Photo credit: http://www.pinterest.com/pin/82683343132809532/

In fact, the afternoon after work that I wrote my post last year, C and I met with our youth group at a McDonald's in our area to discuss about God's true love. We had burgers, fries, and sundaes and our Bibles and for the first time in our lives, C got me some balloons and chocolates. :)) Awww.. That was sweet and extremely unexpected. :))

I don't know what his plans are for today. He just told me that we'll meet after work. All I know is that God knows that I love surprises and for the four months of being married, I am pretty sure He has allowed C to know that as well. (Thank you, Lord!)

Back to my convictions, I still believe in what I wrote last year. As long as we are grounded on the Truth, we are on the right track. As long as we do not allow the media and the business industry to blind us on what True Love is, then, there is nothing to be ashamed of. As long as we prioritize God, recognize Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior, and live under His will by His grace, then, there is nothing to be guilty about.

And oh, we should celebrate love not just today but all the days of our lives, with or without a partner. Remember, God has already demonstrated His Amazing Love to us, about 2,000 years ago. While we're still living in sin, He sent His only Son, Jesus Christ to be a human being and to suffer the cross, to die a shameful death, and to illustrate a glorious Resurrection.

But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we're still sinners, Christ died for us. 
~(Romans 5:8)

And we have the assurance that if we truly accept and believe in our hearts that Jesus Christ is our personal Savior (meaning, He is the only means to our salvation), and confess that He is our Lord (meaning, He has the first and last say in all directions and decisions in our lives), we will have eternal life (meaning not that we will not die, but that we are promised of a life in heaven after our death).

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. 
~(John 3:16)

And while we're at this, let me just say a love note to my husband of almost four months already:

My love... I am always awed at how our great Lord has equipped and enabled you to become a Godly man and a loving husband. We are both imperfect but your humility to owe up to your mistakes is always encouraging and your quickness to forgive is awe-inspiring. Long before you asked me to marry you, I knew that you love me just as the Lord has loved you unconditionally. Thank you for the sacrifices that you are making as my husband and the leader in our family--for those times that you would manually squeeze fresh ponkan juice every day and every night for me, everyday that you wake up early so you can help in the household chores, that night that you had to risk riding a habal-habal to reach me in talibon because I had high fever, those grueling days and nights that you brought me food, water, and meds while i was in solitary confinement for two weeks that I had c/pox, your loving massages when I was tired though I know you were also tired on your part...I can enumerate many more things and all these things always point out one thing: that yours is a sacrificial kind of love. Thank you for the love, forgiveness and grace to allow me to grow to a Godly, loving and submissive wife. May we continue to grow more in love with our King as we continue to minister to each other and others in need. I love you next to God and I pray that I will always love you the way He wants me to. <3  

My God is more than enough...

I've been feeling inadequate in everything--in my personal walk with the Lord, in my job, even in the ministry the Lord has blessed me.

I've been feeling extra low in spirit, always criticizing myself.

I've been feeling far away from the people I work with in the church and in the ministry and the more I think about it, the more I feel so alone and lonely.

I've been feeling a lot of weirdness, a scorched and parched desert of doubt as to whether in this ministry people like me or whether they secretly and silently wish I would just evaporate and move on to another ministry.

But because God loves me and He is perfect, he brought me to a river of refreshment and peace from His truth.

And I leave you all with this quote: "I might not be good enough, brave enough, profound enough. But the God who made me – He. is. enough." ~Lisa Jo

Thanksgiving Tuesday: New Depth of His Love, New Confidence and Security, and A Surpise Provision!

Praises to my King and Savior--Jesus Christ--who has graciously allowed me to experience a new depth of being loved by and being in love with Him. It is amazing how he is using my loneliness and pain to have greater joy and rejoicing in Him. Truly, only He can empty me so He may fill me with Himself.

In this season of seeking His will amid the loss and pain, I praise Him for bringing me closer and closer to Him. I praise and thank Him that He is my First Love, and He is my Only Judge. People may already have their own preconceived judgment and condemnation of what I said, decided, or did, but thank God, they are just people--fellow sinners needing God's grace just like me. Only the Lord Jesus sees my heart and He alone knows what's best for me.

I praise and thank Him for teaching me that my standard should only be His Word, the Bible. His Word is the light to my path and the lamp for my feet. People may give their advice, solicited or not, but I choose Jesus. I choose to honor Him. I choose to listen to Him alone and do what he says. I choose to obey His word, adding nothing or subtracting a zilch from it. I will accept His word and I will not bend it to serve my own pleasure or purpose.

In this season of lack, I praise Him for teaching me to depend upon Him for everything. And in this season of utter surprise, I praise Him for His downpour of provisions--something I did not expect. Just this morning, I was on the phone with a personnel from the Central Office and I was filled with inexpressible joy even when she broke the news I probably have to wait for August for my provisions. But lo and behold, by this afternoon, I received God's provisions. Indeed, I revel in the fact that He is my Great Provider and He alone knows best in when and how He will meet my needs.

For all these, I praise and thank God the Father of Jesus Christ, Jesus Christ Himself who is my Lord and Savior and His Holy Spirit within me, my constant Guide and Help and the Seal of my salvation.

I have my prayer requests and desires but I praise the Lord for giving me this peace to say: "Not my will, Lord, but Your will be done."

Just Like the Wind and the Waves

The men were amazed and asked, “What kind of man is this?

 Even the winds and the waves obey him!”

~Matthew 8:27

The disciples terrified—scared to their wits and in a panic mode. Perhaps they were consumed with the thought of the smallness of their boat in the middle of the vast lake, rocked by the waves and tilted by the winds.

But out of their fear and worry, Jesus arose and demonstrated his majesty. Inside the small boat, the disciples came face to face with the incomparable greatness of their Master. Within their hearts and minds, Jesus challenged them to increase their faith. With just one word from His mouth, He showed to them his awesome authority that even the winds and waves obey him!

In my walk with the Lord this time, I had seen myself behave like the disciples—scared to my wits, in a panic mode, and very much terrified. Similar winds and waves of my insecure and self-centered nature are attacking my very heart and I, sinful as anyone, am at a loss to fight back. The waves have started to drown me; the winds have begun to overwhelm me.

My small boat is rocking and tilting and I was freaking out. I tried to control the situation on my own but the winds and waves became stronger and stronger. I wanted to give up, throw everything, and declare to the winds and waves that they have won the fight.

I did give up.

Not to the winds and waves, though but to my strong and mighty Savior. And it was by giving up that God took control of the situation. It was by letting go that He took over.

And once again, I can say that in His hands, I am always safe—perfectly safe.

If I rely on myself to tackle the winds and the waves, I will always fail. I am just so glad that I do not have to do it myself. In fact, I should not do it myself.

Because it is only through the supernatural enabling grace of Jesus Christ that I can have the exceedingly abundant life He promised.

And you know what? I want to be just like the winds and the waves. I want to obey and follow what Jesus wants me to do, immediately. I want my emotions and insecurities to bow down to the Lord…always…forever.

On my knees, trembling at the awesomeness of my Savior, ready to do His will—this is how I want to remain.

He does not love you less

The Lord has been graciously showering me with opportunities to grow in my walk with Him, more specifically in the areas of controlling and subduing my emotions to His will.

And too many times, I failed. I gave in to my fleshly, sinful nature. I resorted to self-pity and self-centeredness. And you know the rest of the story. I would always end up hurting the people around me. Worst, I would even hurt my Lord and my God.

In the end, God's Spirit would convict me and lead me to repentance. After saying sorry to my Lord and receiving His forgiveness, I would be led to ask for forgiveness from the people I have hurt, who usually would be God's sweet surprise and wonderful blessing to me. And always, he would tell me: "I have already forgiven you. I was just waiting you ask for it."

This ability of his to forgive always amazes me. There are times that I could not believe it. Lately, I developed this habit of following this conversation with a question: "Do you love me less because I sinned?" And always, his answer will be a reassuring, "No."

I am always thankful to the Lord for the kind of man that He has blessed me with. But the more I think about this, the more I am made aware of the Lord's Perfect Love. This ability to graciously forgive illustrated by my sweet surprise and wonderful blessing is only a fraction of Jesus Christ’s grace to forgive and to love me just the same even if I sin against Him.

And this forgiveness and love are not just meant for me, but for you as well—for all of us.

 “But you, O Lord, are a compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness.” ~Psalm 86:15

Notice that the first adjective used by the Psalmist to describe God is compassionate. We have a God who is merciful. He sympathizes and cares for us. And it does not stop there. He is gracious, slow to anger, and complete in love and faithfulness.

Is it not great? Whatever sins you have made—no matter how big or small—God is always there, with arms wide open. He has already forgiven you; He is just waiting for you to ask for it. Remember, He did not wait for you to be good but He already sent His only Son, Jesus Christ to die for you and your sins. Three days after, Christ is risen and He is now waiting for you…waiting for you to come to His arms.

And no matter how many times you sin, He does not love you less. There is nothing that you can say or do which will add or subtract to His love for you. He loved you even before He created you and that love in itself is complete. It is the perfect love.

If you come to Him today and ask for forgiveness, believe that because of the Father’s Perfect Love, He sent His only Son Jesus Christ and through Christ’s death and resurrection, He has forgiven you if you confess your sins. These, He promised in the Bible:

 “For God so loved the world, He gave His one and only Son,

that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life.” ~John 3:16

“If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive
and purify us from all unrighteousness.” ~1 John 1:9

“But now, this is what the LORD says--he who created you, O Jacob, he who formed you, O Israel:
Fear not for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name, you are mine.” ~Isaiah 43:1

You can read more if you want to discover God’s Perfect Love.

If you have sincerely prayed for Jesus Christ to come into your life, believe that He has given His Holy Spirit in your heart and the Holy Spirit will be the one to equip, enable, and strengthen you to do God’s will.

And no matter how many times you fail Him, He does not love you less. He just waits for you to come to His arms and ask for forgiveness.

Answered Prayer

Dear Jesus,

I do not see anything good in all these. What did go wrong? Why did You allow this to happen?

But I remember what is written in the book of Hebrews: faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see. All I can see is a cloud of confusion and a storm of deceits. But I will trust in You, Jesus.

This is easier said than done, though. And too many times, I have let my self to take over the throne in my heart. I need You. I want to fully trust You again.

I want to get back the same love, zeal, passion, and devotion that I had for You... No, scratch that. I desire for the higher kind and the more quality and quantity of love, zeal, passion, and devotion for You than ever before. Please help me. Please answer my prayers. Please bring me back to You. 

I wrote this about two and a half months ago. And in His grace I can boast that He is really a God who answers prayers. He is a God who knows my needs and meets them the perfect way He sees fit. He is a God of control. He is a God who is also my Creator, Father, Potter, Redeemer, Savior, and Comforter. 

1 Peter 4:12-13 says: “Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed.”

And yes, dear friends, the trial that I suffered a couple of months back felt strange. I never thought it would happen to me as a Christian. I never thought it was part of the package deal. It came to a point that I was so disappointed with Christianity that I wanted out. I wanted to withdraw from the fellowship of believers. 

But what the Bible declares is really true. In the same book, the apostle Peter wrote: “In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while, you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials” (1 Peter 1:6). Charles Spurgeon, in one of his sermons, said that our faith will be tested variously. Take note that the word of God uses the term, “all kinds of trials.”

But these all kinds of trials are not without a purpose. The passage goes on to say these trials happen so our faith, which is of greater worth than gold, may be proven true and may bring us to praise, glory, and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed (1 Peter 1:7). 

And I could not have agreed more. In my case, the Lord allowed those trials to come to my life because He wanted me to learn to stay in the fellowship and to honor Him, no matter what. Primarily, however, He wanted to rid me of all my negativity and doubts against other believers—something that hinders me from having a pure and genuine fellowship with Him, something which was already tantamount to self-righteousness. And He has to remove that ugly part in my soul, purifying me by His fire so I may be conformed to His mold. 

As a result, the pain and suffering were transformed to forgiveness and victory in the Lord. These led me to seek Jesus Christ and to come closer to Him. Once again, I was reminded that 1 Corinthians 5:17 is not a one-time phenomenon; it is a moment-by-moment shaping process. Also, He led me to realize that the dying to Self and living for Christ mentioned in Galatians 2:20 must be done in a moment-by-moment basis. 

I am not a finished work, yet; but He has already finished salvation for me in the Cross.

And now I can only boast in His powerful work in me and through me. The truth in James 4:7-8 is much sweeter now that I have experienced it firsthand: “Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Come near to God and he will come near to You…” 

Thank you, Lord, for these Biblical truths and promises!

I love a risen and living King!

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! 

In his great mercy he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, and into an inheritance that can never perish, spoil or fade. 

This inheritance is kept in heaven for you, who through faith are shielded by God’s power until the coming of the salvation that is ready to be revealed in the last time.

~1 Peter 1:3-5

Aren't you glad that we are loving and serving a risen and living King and Savior? 

I am. I really am. And I rejoice, shout, and leap for joy! Hallelujah to Jesus Christ, my Savior and King!

Nothing and No One

Romans 8:38-39, NLT
"And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord."

Well-assured. Amazed. In awe. Awestruck. Humbled down. Thank you, Jesus!