I do not see anything good in all these. What did go wrong? Why did You allow this to happen?
But I remember what is written in the book of Hebrews: faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see. All I can see is a cloud of confusion and a storm of deceits. But I will trust in You, Jesus.
This is easier said than done, though. And too many times, I have let my self to take over the throne in my heart. I need You. I want to fully trust You again.
I want to get back the same love, zeal, passion, and devotion that I had for You... No, scratch that. I desire for the higher kind and the more quality and quantity of love, zeal, passion, and devotion for You than ever before. Please help me. Please answer my prayers. Please bring me back to You.
I wrote this about two and a half months ago. And in His grace I can boast that He is really a God who answers prayers. He is a God who knows my needs and meets them the perfect way He sees fit. He is a God of control. He is a God who is also my Creator, Father, Potter, Redeemer, Savior, and Comforter.
1 Peter 4:12-13 says: “Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed.”
And yes, dear friends, the trial that I suffered a couple of months back felt strange. I never thought it would happen to me as a Christian. I never thought it was part of the package deal. It came to a point that I was so disappointed with Christianity that I wanted out. I wanted to withdraw from the fellowship of believers.
But what the Bible declares is really true. In the same book, the apostle Peter wrote: “In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while, you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials” (1 Peter 1:6). Charles Spurgeon, in one of his sermons, said that our faith will be tested variously. Take note that the word of God uses the term, “all kinds of trials.”
But these all kinds of trials are not without a purpose. The passage goes on to say these trials happen so our faith, which is of greater worth than gold, may be proven true and may bring us to praise, glory, and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed (1 Peter 1:7).
And I could not have agreed more. In my case, the Lord allowed those trials to come to my life because He wanted me to learn to stay in the fellowship and to honor Him, no matter what. Primarily, however, He wanted to rid me of all my negativity and doubts against other believers—something that hinders me from having a pure and genuine fellowship with Him, something which was already tantamount to self-righteousness. And He has to remove that ugly part in my soul, purifying me by His fire so I may be conformed to His mold.
As a result, the pain and suffering were transformed to forgiveness and victory in the Lord. These led me to seek Jesus Christ and to come closer to Him. Once again, I was reminded that 1 Corinthians 5:17 is not a one-time phenomenon; it is a moment-by-moment shaping process. Also, He led me to realize that the dying to Self and living for Christ mentioned in Galatians 2:20 must be done in a moment-by-moment basis.
I am not a finished work, yet; but He has already finished salvation for me in the Cross.
And now I can only boast in His powerful work in me and through me. The truth in James 4:7-8 is much sweeter now that I have experienced it firsthand: “Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Come near to God and he will come near to You…”
Thank you, Lord, for these Biblical truths and promises!